Sunday, May 07, 2006

A Two-Prong Attack

The saga continues. D and I decided to take matters into our own hands this weekend, so with a storm rolling in we hurriedly gathered our weapons.

While trying to minimize the environmental impact (this is a working ranch after all) we knew we had to act fast. Since bugs don't react well to soap we thought it might work just as well as expensive cans of poison. After preparing an arsenal of soapy water balloons, D got to work on preparing the field of battle.

The stage was set for our no holds barred assault.

D even came at them from another angle just to up our odds.

Though the water balloon contingent suffered many losses, we felt the assault was not only necessary, but effective.

(This is in no way an advertisement for Dish Network. They are worth about as much as the balloon carnage you see before you. And they are far less fun to deal with than bees.)

This was but just one prong of our attack. As fun as this prong was, it alone would not suffice. We had to attack from two sides to ensure victory.

We raided the BBQ aisle of the local grocery store. Though a duralog would have been best, we made due with lighter fluid, mesquite chips and strike-a-fire starters.

The final step was to sweep up the bee carnage and hope for the best.

The fire has been going for the better part of the weekend and only once have we heard the telltale buzzing from the chimney. I think this qualifies as blitzkrieg. Guess that German heritage in me came in handy. Die bastards.


DM said...

The Bastards, The. Anyone who speaks German can't be bad.

Mel-a-rific said...

Who can it bee knocking at my door?

Go away. Don't come 'round here no more.

Whooo can it beeee now?

Uncle Joe said...

Blitzkreig? Wrong analogy, unless lightning actually struck the chimney. But smoke and fire sounds more like final solution to me....

Uncle Joe

Anonymous said...

Glad to hear that y'all are safe...but, for how long?
Up and atom!
Up and at them.
Up and atom!
Up and AT THEM!

tiny robot said...

If only smoke and soap worked against bears...

tiny robot said...

...or the C.H.U.D.

-Rick said...

You guys are f'ing crazy. Those pictures had me laughing for a good 20 minutes. I'm glad to hear though that you got rid of most of them if not all.